Warped Cloud Hopper No. 53 | Cigar Reviews by HB Cigars

Cloud Hopper is an amazing name for a cigar. Honestly, it's an amazing name for pretty much anything. I feel like this is what someone would name a strain of Cannabis. But Cannabis is a drug, and I'd never touch a drug. I don't even know what a drug is… moving on. Kyle Gellis is a mad tobacco scientist who created this with his brother Devin to celebrate their love of travel, which in the cigar world means "we went to Nicaragua a lot for quality control and called it vacation." The brothers reportedly named it Cloud Hopper because of how often they fly, which is the most first-world origin story since someone invented artisanal ice cubes.

BUY CLOUD HOPPER HERE

🔥 THE VITALS 🔥

Cigar: Cloud Hopper No. 53

Master Blender: Kyle & Devin Gellis - Brothers who turned sibling rivalry into tobacco alchemy

Size: 5 1/4 x 42 Corona

Country of Origin: Nicaragua

Wrapper: Nicaraguan Shade Grown Jalapa Corojo '99

Binder: Nicaraguan Corojo '99

Filler: Nicaraguan Criollo '98 & Corojo '99 (AGANORSA)

Price: ~$9.50

Aging: Factory fresh from TABSA

🚀 WE ARE LIT!

Draw: Good flow with just the right resistance - like sipping a milkshake through a normal straw

Burn: Even and consistent throughout

Smoke Output: Decent but not amazing - more understated than overstated

Ash: Firm gray ash that holds respectably

Good draw right from the start with a slightly chewy smoke texture that coats the palate. Decent but not amazing smoke production - this isn't trying to fog up your neighbor's security camera. The construction is solid with AGANORSA tobacco throughout, which is basically the Hermès of Nicaraguan leaf. Kyle Gellis likes to serve up medium body blends, and this one sits right in his wheelhouse.

🎢 FLAVOR JOURNEY

FIRST THIRD:

nougat, cream, cedar, light cashew

Nougat leads off like finding Halloween candy you forgot about in March - still good, slightly surprising. Cream follows, smooth and present without being overwhelming. Cedar provides structure while light cashew notes emerge, creating a profile that's basically what would happen if a nut allergy warning became sentient and delicious. The sweetness is restrained, sophisticated - this isn't trying to be dessert, it's more like the amuse-bouche at a restaurant you need reservations for.

SECOND THIRD:

toasted cedar, light cream, baking spices

Houston we have a problem.

Wrapper Cracked a few minutes in

Cracked wrapper aside, toasted cedar takes over, bringing warmth without fire. Light cream maintains its presence but steps back, like an introvert at a party who found the host's cat. Baking spices emerge - not the pumpkin spice latte variety, but actual baking spices that your grandmother kept in tins older than your parents. The transition is smooth, proving the Gellis brothers know what they're doing beyond just having cool business cards.

FINAL THIRD:

charred cedar, baking spaces, nuts, leather

Charred cedar dominates now, bringing that campfire-minus-the-mosquitoes vibe. Baking spices intensify alongside emerging nut flavors that weren't specific enough to identify - they're just "nuts," like when someone asks what you do for work and you say "computers." Leather sneaks in at the end, fashionably late but welcome. The finish is clean and satisfying, wrapping up like a Netflix series that actually stuck the landing.

BUY CLOUD HOPPER HERE

🏆 THE VERDICT:

B+ TIER

Flavor: B+

Construction: C- (The damn thing blew up on me)

Availability: A

Price: A

Final Rating:

This medium-bodied style proves Kyle Gellis knows his lane and stays in it - no unnecessary lane changes or turn signals left on for miles. Cloud Hopper is a pretty damn cool name for a cigar, and thankfully, the blend lives up to the branding. At $6.30, this is priced like it wants to be your daily smoke, not your special occasion flex.

📊BOTTOM LINE

The Cloud Hopper No. 53 is what happens when boutique blending meets accessible pricing - like finding out your favorite food truck also does catering. The Gellis brothers created something that doesn't try to knock you out with strength or complexity, but instead delivers consistent, enjoyable flavors that won't require a spreadsheet to track. It's the cigar equivalent of a reliable friend who always picks up when you call - not the most exciting person you know, but definitely someone you want around. The all-Nicaraguan AGANORSA tobacco provides quality bones for this blend, and at this price point, you can afford to hop clouds all day long without checking your bank balance and crying.

TLDR: If you like medium body corojo wrapper cigars, you'll probably like this one.

RomaCraft Neanderthal HN | Cigar Reviews by HB Cigars

Are you a psychopath? Do you like absurd amounts of nicotine? Maybe addiction problems? Then I have the cigar for you! Buckle up boys, today we are looking at the RomaCraft Neanderthal HN, a cigar packed with flavor and alkaloids. This beast features the notorious Green River Valley Sucker One Double Ligero from Pennsylvania - a tobacco so strong they had to add five other fillers just to balance it out. It's like adding vegetables to your kid's mac and cheese, except the mac and cheese wants to fight you.

BUY NEANDERTHAL HERE

🔥 THE VITALS 🔥

Cigar: Neanderthal HN

Master Blender: Skip Martin & Esteban Disla

Size: 5 x 52/58 (Figurado)

Country of Origin: Nicaragua

Wrapper: Mexican San Andrés

Binder: Connecticut Broadleaf

Filler: Dominican Olor, Nicaraguan (Condega, Jalapa, Pueblo Nuevo, Estelí), Pennsylvania Green River Valley Sucker One Double Ligero

MSRP: $14.00

Aging: Fresh from Nica Sueño factory

🚀 WE ARE LIT!

Draw: Perfect. Like breathing through a $100 bill.

Burn: Straighter than your uncle's political opinions at Thanksgiving

Smoke Output: Thick as morning fog in San Francisco

Ash: Holds like it's got separation anxiety

Good construction with a single skinny burnt orange and white band (a tribute to Skip Martin's Texas Longhorns obsession). The flat cap is a little weird but what can you do - it's like a haircut your mom gave you in third grade, functional but questionable. Great smoke production immediately on light up. The unique figurado shape resembles Frankenstein's head on top and a bowling pin on the bottom. The wrapper has a gritty look with oils and magnesium bumps that make it look like it just finished a CrossFit workout.

🎢 FLAVOR JOURNEY

FIRST THIRD

espresso, pepper/retro, cacao, earth

Espresso leads the charge with enough intensity to make your barista jealous. Pepper dominates the retrohale while cacao provides a sweet counterpoint. Earth rounds out the opening, creating a profile that's basically what would happen if Starbucks opened a cigar lounge. The Pennsylvania Double Ligero announces its presence immediately - this isn't your grandmother's mild Connecticut, unless your grandmother was a longshoreman who chewed tobacco for breakfast.

SECOND THIRD

espresso, dark chocolate, oak, leather 

Espresso maintains its dominance while dark chocolate emerges, creating a mocha profile that would cost $8 at any coffee shop with exposed brick walls. Oak enters the mix alongside leather, adding complexity that justifies why you're smoking this instead of attending your cousin's gender reveal party. The velvet smoke texture coats your palate like an overly affectionate golden retriever - persistent but somehow still welcome.

FINAL THIRD: EARTH, WIND & FIRE (MINUS THE WIND)

earth, pepper, leather, charred oak

Earth takes center stage, grounding the experience like your accountant during tax season. Pepper returns with vengeance on the retrohale, joined by leather and charred oak. The long finish lingers like that friend who doesn't understand social cues at the end of a party. The full strength really shows here - if nicotine was a personality trait, this would be that guy who brings his own hot sauce to restaurants.

BUY NEANDERTHAL HERE

🏆 THE VERDICT:

A- TIER

Flavor: A

Construction: A-

Availability: B+

Price: B+

The Neanderthal is a beefy full-bodied stick that delivers good strong flavors throughout with a velvet smoke texture and long finish. This isn't just strong for the sake of being strong - it's balanced and complex, like a bodybuilder who also reads poetry. Full strength and full body mean this isn't for beginners unless they enjoy lying down unexpectedly.

📊BOTTOM LINE

RomaCraft created a cigar that's basically natural selection in action - smoke this and either evolve or tap out. The Green River Valley Sucker One Double Ligero isn't just marketing speak; it's a legitimate warning label that should come with a waiver. But here's the thing: it's actually excellent. The blend is masterfully balanced despite containing enough nicotine to make a horse reconsider its life choices. At around $13-15, it's reasonably priced for a cigar that doubles as both a smoking experience and a sobriety test. Skip Martin and team have created something that separates the casual smokers from those who view nicotine tolerance as a competitive sport.

TLDR: A paleolithic powerhouse that delivers complex flavors alongside enough strength to make you see your ancestors - perfect for masochists with refined palates.

God of Fire Don Carlos 2020 by Arturo Fuente - Cigar Reviews by HB Cigars

When Prometheus stole fire from Zeus, he probably didn't expect it to end up as a $30 cigar collaboration with the Fuente family. This annual limited release is harder to find than a reasonable explanation for why Caldwell cigars exist. The God of Fire Don Carlos is what happens when Arturo Fuente and Prometheus decide to make cigars instead of therapy their expensive hobby. Made once a year in quantities that would make Supreme drops look abundantly available, retailers literally limit you to one per customer - like you're buying Sudafed or trying to adopt a rescue dog.

BUY GOD OF FIRE HERE or CIGARS HERE

🔥 THE VITALS 🔥

Cigar: God of Fire Don Carlos 2020

Master Blender: Fuente

Size: 5 1/4 x 50 Robusto

Country of Origin: Dominican Republic

Wrapper: Ecuadorian

Binder: Dominican

Filler: Dominican

Price: ~$29-35 (if you can find it)

Aging: Years of aging before release, then likely years in your humidor while you wait for an occasion worthy enough

🚀 WE ARE LIT!

Draw: Perfect. At least almost.

Burn: Straighter than your uncle after a few bourbons

Smoke Output: adequate

Ash: I ashed myself

Great construction from Fuente - this isn't some gas station impulse buy. Great smoke production from the jump with a slightly tight draw that's more selective than a bouncer at Berghain. The golden Ecuadorian wrapper gleams like the retirement watch you'll never get because pensions don't exist anymore. Each cigar comes with two bands: one showing Prometheus getting torched by Zeus (relatable), and another with the year - because even cigars need vintage dating profiles now.

🎢 FLAVOR JOURNEY

FIRST THIRD: THE BAKERY HEIST

sweet bread, butter, slight spice, cedar, slight fruit 

Sweet bread opens the show like walking past a Parisian bakery you can't afford to enter. Butter joins immediately, creating a pastry profile that would make Paul Hollywood weep. Slight spice tickles the retrohale while cedar provides structure. A hint of fruit peeks through - subtle, like your friend's attempts to mention their Peloton without actually mentioning their Peloton. The 93-point rating starts making sense immediately.

SECOND THIRD: THE CEDAR SITUATION

cedar, dried fruit, toast, leather

Cedar takes command while dried fruit emerges, creating a profile that tastes like expensive furniture smells. Toast replaces the sweet bread, adding a charred element that pairs with emerging leather notes. The Dominican tobacco shows its pedigree here - this is what happens when tobacco gets a liberal arts education and a trust fund. The complexity builds like the plot of a prestige TV show you'll never finish.

FINAL THIRD: THE LEATHER LOUNGE

leather, charred cedar, dried fruit

Leather dominates the finale with the confidence of someone who replies-all on purpose. Charred cedar intensifies, bringing campfire notes without the part where someone brings an acoustic guitar. Dried fruit maintains its presence, sweet but refined, like finding out your Uber driver has a PhD. The finish is long and contemplative - this is a cigar that went to therapy and did the work.

BUY GOD OF FIRE HERE or CIGARS HERE

🏆 THE VERDICT:

A+ TIER

Flavor: A+

Construction: A

Availability: C-

Price: B+ (It's $30 but actually worth it)

Final Rating:

This is what happens when Fuente decides to flex. The blend showcases why people camp outside cigar shops for Fuente releases like they're waiting for sneaker drops. The progression from buttery pastry to leather-wrapped luxury is smoother than your excuses for being late to brunch.

📊BOTTOM LINE

The God of Fire Don Carlos 2020 is proof that sometimes gatekeeping is justified. At ~

$30 per stick with a one-per-customer limit, this isn't just a cigar - it's a flex that actually backs it up with substance. The collaboration between Fuente and Prometheus created something that lives up to its mythological namesake, assuming Prometheus was really into notes of butter and cedar. Finding these requires either connections, patience, or a willingness to trade your firstborn (check local laws first). But when you do find one, you're holding liquid gold that happens to be flammable - which is probably what Prometheus had in mind all along.

TLDR: Buy it if you find it, even if you do or do not have the money.